Turning 26

I am turning 26.
But somehow, I feel sad.
Not because I am getting older.
Just, somehow, I feel sad.
Hormonal, maybe.

Still, thank you Allah for this 26 years.
I wouldnt know if this is my final year of living or I will be given chances to have more years ahead.

Am i allowed

Am i allowed to feel sad
Over things that haven't started
Am i allowed to feel sad
Over things that i myself haven't sure of
Am i allowed to feel sad
When u said can't instead of no
Am i allowed
To feel
At least
Sad?

2017

Assalamualaikum.

Feeling like writing again. It's been a while, and it's 2017 now.

Read me, twenty-seventeen. I'm 26 this year. Twenty six guys.

Well, my 25 years old me got nothing much to share, I probably having a very chaotic 2016.

Nothing chaotic outside, it is just me, inside, being chaotic.

2016 taught me a lot, that, a lot makes me starting to hate me. Haha.

I'm trying to get my feet back on the track this year, I sincerely pray for that.

I pray that, in 2017, I'll becoming a better person; daughter, friend, teacher, and mostly, a better servant of Allah.

I pray that, for you too.


after almost 2 years

i 'm back!! haha
i can't believe i have the urge to write again.
o well, who cares, nobody will read this by the way.

after 2 years not updating things in this blog, proudly saying, now i am officially a teacher. a makan gaji teacher. lol. alhamdulillah alhamdulillah alhamdulillah :)

well here are some of the 2015's pictures.




so guys, i am a teacher now. pray the best for me and my pupilsss

hi

Assalamualaikum and hi there.

It has been a tiring months for me, and my friends. Well, i guess it won't stop. after all this chaotic months in maktab, There goes working world. new world. more challenges. and that moment, we will miss maktab haha. irony. O well, that is the cycle anyway.

nothing much to say. in act, i wrote nothing here.bhaha i just feel like writing something but i dont know how to put the feelings in words. haiz.

ok dah la, i have to finish my proceeding and off to sleep.

till next time, inshaAllah :D

hectic: final semester

assalamualaikum.

in another few months, i'll finish my study in IPSAH. in another few months, i might get posted to i-don't-know-which-state. in another few months, i'll be longer be a full time student.

but the another-few-months thingy, to go through it, is not easy. like seriously, this august, September and October are the most crucial months for me, and my friends. especially TESL people. action research report, the seminar, assignments, SPP interview, MQA files for accreditation (TESL only, we're pioneer T.T) and APTIS (yeah, i have to reseat haha not my luck yet to pass)

these are all to be settled by October. *take a super deeeeep breath*

doakan kami, my whole batch, pismp ambilan januari 2011 able to go through all theseee, and especially Tesl cohort 1, my cohort. too many things to do, within this time frame. may Allah ease everything.

may Allah bless. tata~

examination


semester 7, 2 papers, 19th and 22nd May. well, i pray that this week will be all fine. and move fast. i just want to home now. good luck everyone!


cinta.

assalamualaikum.

so yesterday, i went for daurah at Khansaa'. in midst of assignments which i did not finish it yet, i took the risk. just because i miss the environment. i miss having those people talk about good stuff and indirectly their talk becomes advices and reminders for me. eventhough they did not know any of my problem, Allah sent them intuition to actually talk about some stuff and apparently those random stuff are goodies for the listeners, like me.

*smile*

basically, these are what i gained from yesterday's daurah;

- in doing da'wah, you must have the fiqh, or method. macam cikgu, nak ajar budak2 dekat sekolah, we have our methods untuk aproach them kan. sama la juga macam da'wah because every single person ada titik sentuhan yang berbeza.
- being a daie, akan ada jugak tarikan untuk jadi futur. But knowing that you are a daie, you have to find ways untuk lari dari futur tatkala futur datang menarik awak.
- baca, faham, tadabbur, tafsir al-quran. semua nya berbeza. 
- to understand quran, we must know arab. which i am very regret to stop learning the language. well hey selagi hidup ni, jangan berhenti belajar kan ;)
- awak pernah bercinta? nak tau cara jatuh cinta dengan Allah? read His love letter everyday, hayati His love letter, u sure will loveee Him the most in your life.

*tarik nafas*

banyak lagi pengisiannya but ini la core dia. i always impressed with kakak2 or adik2 yang bagi pengisian because they have the urge or keberanian untuk sampaikan what they know. sampaikanlah walau satu ayat sekalipun. well at least they have something nak di'present' kan dekat Allah one fine day, kan?

let just pray yang kita juga mampu sebarkan da'wah pada orang lain. let's pray that we have good things to be presented bila jumpa Allah nanti. may Allah bless. may we love Allah more than anything else in this world. Wallahuallam.



(futur= rasa down)

p/s: Ukhti Khaulah cakap, kadang2 masa kita dok sorang2 appe salah kalau kita cakap 'I LOVE YOU ALLAH'. mesti Allah suka kan? *wink*
 

doa buat mesir

akhawat ikhwah fillah.
sungguh, aku dengki dengan kalian.
kerna kalian punya kesempatan untuk jadi penegak agama.

namun aku sedar, 
ujian ini bukan untuk mereka yang punya iman seperti aku.
ujian ini untuk kamu yang punya iman setinggi gunung.
yang mana jika diacu senapang dihadapan mu,
kamu tidak akan berundur, 
malah akan terus maju.

wallahu, aku tak tahu,
bagaimana jika aku berada ditempat kalian.
dengan iman yang seperti air menggelegak.
apakah mampu aku berdiri gah,
atau terjelopok jatuh tanda menyerah?
sungguh, aku tidak tahu.

akhawat ikhwah fillah,
maaf kan aku saudara ku.
aku tidak mampu menghantar jasadku ke sana.
untuk sama-sama berjuang, melawan yang jelas kejam.

yang aku mampu, sekadar menadah tangan, 
mengirim doa.
mohon supaya dihantar tentera-tentera Allah untuk membantu kalian.
mohon supaya mereka yang zalim akan hancur ditelan bumi.
mohon supaya hati kalian makin kuat walau jasad makin lemah.
mohon kemenangan akan menjadi milik kalian.
penegak agama-Nya.

maafkan aku saudaraku. maafkan aku.
hanya doa yang aku mampu titipkan. 
dari jauh.
maaf.


may Allah bless my brothers and sisters in Egypt. i knew 2 uncles from ikhwanul muslimin. i seriously don't know what happened to them. may Allah bless them. may they get the title 'syahid' that even me want it. 

delete

i'm about to delete my old post kahkah

just because u know, history don't always look beautiful. cis ayat

the story: another 20th january

assalamualaikum.

alhamdulillah, masih diberi peluang untuk menghirup udara segar ipsah. hari nie kedah cuti, hari keputeraan sultan kata mereka. wah wah, kalau macam tu, in my familly ada dua orang yang sama hari kelahiran dengan sultan la ye? arwah khairi, sama dengan sultan kedah which is today and me, sama dengan sultan perak.haha

forget the hari keputeraan thingy. so, today is my another 20th january without my brother. hee, kalau tanya diri sendiri, kau sedih lagi ke, benda dah nak masuk 3 tahun dah pon. cukup2 la nak sedih nya pon.

*diam*

mat saleh la kata, time heals everything. nak percaya ke tak ye? haha..heals to the extend of me talking about my brother without crying is a no. heals to the extend where my mind can actually accept that Allah took him is a yes. itu fakta yang tak boleh di kata tidak, sebab memang setiap manusia mahu tidak mahu akan kembali pada pencipta mereka. cuma mungkin masa yang berbeza, tapi dia tak kenal usia. kau muda mahupun tua, kalau sudah sampai waktu nya, that's it.

ah sudah, ape bebelan yang aku tulis pagi2 nie..haha..senyum, walau pahit terpaksa kau telan. yang pahit itu la yang bisa menjadi ubat paling berkesan untuk hati, yang pasti dengan izin-Nya.

hari ini, 20 januari. antara tarikh yang akan aku ingat sampai bila2. ya, aku harap aku akan ingat sampai bila2.

al-fatihah untuk muhammad khairi azemi. may Allah bless.

TUDUNG AKEL 2 TONE BIDANG 60

Available in 12 colours, only cost u RM 23. we offered u good quality tudung akel with lower prices compare to others. 














Feel free to visit our facebook page, TUDUNG BAWAL BIDANG 55

the verse: al-naml:4

asssalamualaikum

"Verily, those who believe not in the Hereafter, We have made their deeds fair-seeming to them, so they wander about blindly." (al-naml:4)

mendalam ayat nie. memang kena batang hidung sendiri. ye la, kita cakap kita percaya pada hari akhirat, tapi still buat benda yang kononnya nampak cantik di mata kita, tapi hakikatnya jelek di mata Allah. agree? haih, it's time to reflect myself. 3 minggu, what have u done to yourself at least, dear fatihah? i am sure u do not want to be one of the-they-wander-about-blindly type of person, aite? T.T


monolog luaran1_sebulan tak sharing2, kekok, kena pulak nak switch guna bahasa standard di bumi kelate. anyway, alhamdulillah, masih diberi kesempatan untuk mentarbiah diri walau cuti. eh, tarbiah itu tak pernah cuti tau.ingat ye kawan2.may Allah bless :)

monolog luaran2_nak tolong berdebar untuk bakal pengantin boleh?hee..22 hari lagi aww ;)


the shop: tudung bidang 60, 55 and 50

bismillahirrahmanirrahim

assalamualaikum

feel free to come and visit our page, TUDUNG BAWAL BIDANG 55
InshaAllah, we will provide you with different type of scarf (tudung) from bidang 50-60.
For the begginers, u can try the Tudung Turki Bidang 50 
while for those who are already wearing long hijab (inshaAllah istiqamah), check out Tudung Bawal 2 & 3 tones bidang 55 and also Tudung Akel Polkadot bidang 60
Here are some picture that might catch your eyes ;)







don't forget to visit our page at TUDUNG BAWAL BIDANG 55!

till next time. salam alaik :)

p/s: any suggestion about the page's name? kami nak tukar but have no idea, at all. maklumla, cuti kan. #eh

the story: i'm here

bismillahirrahmanirahim

assalamualaikum
am still alive and kicking #eh.eiduladha
may Allah bless those who read my blog. yeah. i know, i didn't write for quite sometimes. busy ke malas ke. entah, just that Allah didn't give me any ilham to write something worth to be read. will be writing soon, inshaAllah, tunggu habis exam rabu nih..and yeah, i have like bundles of stories to be told, but we'll see..

till next time. inshaAllah. salam alaik

p/s: will be facing a lot of good byes and hellos soon. may Allah keep us stronger and firmer :)

the wish: nine

bismillahirahmanirahim

assalamualaikum.

i'm not that hardworking to write these days. don't ask why, even me asking myself, i found it hard to give even a single strong point.zzz to me.anyway, the statement below is just from my facebook status. see, betapa malasnya ceq sampai sanggup copy status je.harhar -.-

to my lovely akhwats, happy 9 month. idk why munira reminds us during our 9th month, but hey, there must be reasons kan? i just need time to process the reasons.acewah.

9 bulan melayari so-called-new-life. 9 bulan yang tiap2 hari mahu tak mahu must learn new things; sebab mulut kata sayang agama, sayang Allah, sayang rasulullah. dan kalau sayang tapi setakat di mulut memang tak best la kan? #nauzubillah
sayang yang bergerak bersama2 action is the one that not only me, but u too are trying ur best to do so. dan 9 bulan and onwards tipulah kalau cakap hidup smooth
 takde naik turun bukit. tapi sebab sayang, sama2 kita gagahkan diri, gagahkan hati, gagahkan semua yang ada tu untuk Dia. even kalau ditakdirkan kena buang sorang2 kat tengah laut tu pon sila jadi gagah.

"dan 9 bulan ni dah berapa kali tergelincir off track. ada masa dua2 kaki, ada masa sebelah kaki dan ada masa juga dengan badan-badan sekali,heh ( Munira Anis,2012)"

tapi Allah still sayang kita.kenapa cakap Allah sayang? even kita off track pon dia boleh pusingkan hati kita pada dia dengan jayanya. hebat kan?

entah apa akan terjadi esok, next week, next month, next year, next few years. sungguh kita tak kan pernah mampu predict. tapi mohon pada Allah dipermudahkan segala urusan, diperkukuhkan iman di dada. allahumma ameen allahumma ameen.

till next time.inshaAllah.assalamualaikum
 

the thought: baitul muslim is cool like that!

bismilahirahmanirahim

assalamualaikum

amboi gambar.ehehe.ameen :)

i have to admit that this few days, I've encountered like a lot of situation that discussed about baitul muslim.it was cool though because i can actually pick up more or less information from each conversation that I've had.,and seriously those conversations, situations and etc makes me think triple times about the idea of marriage.

it doesn't mean that i'm against marriage.oh no, not at all la buddy. i wish to get married earlier that my ummi did..haha..btw, she got married when she's 26..so, the latest for me is 25..eh.haha.macam nie pon boleh ke? whatever it is, we planned, but His planning is way much better that ours..back to the topic, to be honest, i am one of the supporter when it comes to early marriage..i think it is cool to be able to hold the big responsibility at young age..but still before you get married, you have to actually think ahead..bukan saje suka2 nak kahwin for the sake of having halal relationship la kirenye..

yeap, ahead here means, about your responsibility, your relationship and many more aspects.. there are too many to be listed here, pikiaq sendiri naa..hehe..bukan ape, when u have decided to get married, you are actually have made decision to share your life with a person that u think u might know him/her but actually there are too many things that you do not know..get what i mean? for sure, they will be a lot of minor and major problems in marriage, where you and your partner should handle them with care.. it is good actually to prepare yourself with some plans/solution before you encounter the problems.. ever heard sediakan payung sebelum hujan? basically, this is my point..haha..punye panjang aku explain -.-

and yeah, buat pemuda pemudi harapan agama kat luar sana..never ever forget our main goal that is to be a good khalifah to Allah. stated there in surah al-baqarah, verse 30..marriage is not the goal, it is only an instrument for us to grab the goal..get it?

but hey, let's make sure that the baitul muslim that we build can help us to be a better muslim/muslimah..who knows after marriage, our iman increase, our ibadah increase..who knows kan? *wink2* so, for those who are going to get engage, going to get marry, timba la sebanyak mana ilmu that you can..have sharing session with elders, have sessions like tanyalah ustaz ke, follow a few baitul muslim's course ke...never stop learning and asking questions..even after marriage, never stop learning..believe me, even after 20 years of marriage you will not stop learning about this topic. *gaya macam banyak pengalaman -.-

anyway, baitul muslim is cool like that. eh, harus la cool, things that Allah asked us to do are cool tau.. but again, this is not our main goal..and never love someone more than your love towards Allah and nabi Muhammad S.A.W..inshaAllah, your life will be blessed :)

ahah, sangat la weird when i write about this..this is my humble opinion la..my opinion might not the same as yours because each of us did have different way of thinking..world won't be fun if all of us think alike..so, what do you think? baitul muslim is cool like that because .... *isi tempat kosong*

pens off.till next time.salam alaik

p/s: things had been clarified.i'm so happy. i feel like flying now.weeehuu..thank you Allah :)

the story: raya

bismillahirahmanirahim

assalamualaikum

too many things to do. too many things that i want to do but i don't have the opportunity to do. too many things inside my head that is waiting for their turn to come out and show themselves. oho..dilema wanita sungguh...haha..anyway, salam eid to all..well, we're still in syawal right?

and yeah, today is september. it shows that i will have to go through a super busy month. assignments, perkhemahan KRS, Bina Insan Guru and etc.. and i really have no clue how i'm suppose to do all those things calmly..haha..may Allah ease our days..

malaih dah ceq nak menaip..nah amik la tatap gambaq raya ceq yang tak brapa nak havoc sgt tahun nie.. and i wonder why..age factor kah? -.-

masa nie tak nangis lagi.kental la konon.
dang.masa nih xleh tahan dah.haha -.- *buruk nor*
le familia
with uda's children
umi saya jangok
kid's rule
and i do not know when will i post a more serious entry. may Allah gives me the ilham to write.ameen.

off writing.till next time, assalamualaikum

the story: final pbs

bismillahirahmanirahim

assalamualaikum

yes people, finally we met our final pbs or sbe or ros or whatever you want to call. it's sad though.. yela, next year da praktikum..no more main2 relax at school..like seriously kalau praktikum boleh main2 i want to do praktikum every sem la gitu..and no more cuti lebih seminggu..how sad is that? very sad T.T

anyway, here's some pictures taken at the school. sekolah dekat rumah jah..sk panji cewah..kami 14 orang serang that school and we are too awkward with each other *except for some* especially the guys.. tapi hari last *which is today* ok la sikit..boleh la bawak bual..cewah

intro haruslah muka sendiri.eh.abe praktikum sedap tido kat blake -.-
hari nie sayer dapat duit rayer. they said, not me 
excited nyo awokkk
we start our final day with congkak battle.lol @library
these two super cute kids watching us playing congkak.comel dop teacher?hehe
pemes la izzul.masuk video benar.ekeke
4 ipg :)
cenderamata untuk sekolah. the boys knew how to choose present.syukran geng2 ipkdri
bagi hadiah #1
bagi hadiah #2
puteri2 manis.eh ;)
kami :)
pbs kali nie 4 hari ja.ye la, esok cuti mehhh..and yeah, pejam celik pejam celik, da nak masuk 27 ramadhan dah..i'm super sad now..i did'nt perform well in this ramadhan..ya Allah rugi sangat2.. sedih, sebab diri nie belum pasti akan ada peluang untuk bertemu lagi ramadhan next year..we never know future, kan?

ok la, azam dua tiga hari nie nak buat biskut raya cewah kau.haha.irfan la nih bersungguh benor..nak buat biskut nahh..kalau tak sedap dia telan la sorang biskut tuh..haha

till next time, inshaAllah.

assalamualaikummmm :)

the story: events

bismillahirahmanirahim

assalamualaikum

fasa ke tiga dah datang. so how's your spirit? is the graph increase or decrease? well, i do hope and pray that our graph makin naik and naik and naik. and yeah, 10 malam terakhir is the night where we try to 'catch' lailatul qadr.. why don't we try to catch it..who knows, rezeki kita jumpa malam tu kan? only Allah knows..hee

oh btw, there's a lot of events happened during ramadhan in IPSAH. like yes, a lot..and being me, pictures tell stories better than me..me is not a good storyteller..aha

iftar jamaie IPSAH

that's IPGM's rector and our pengarah

and the moreh.i ate like a lot.teehee

iftar jamaie with usrah mate
kete mistique shafik.syukran akhi bagi pinjam kereta.huhu


tempting enough?ahaks

sesi fotografi @jeti semeling



sambutan kemerdekaan
my love.saranghae!!
banner kelas kami yeay
classmates FTW
muka peliks FTW.haha
jejaka (?) Tesl FTW

andddd now i'm home.teehee..it's  good to be home..and yeah, at last fasting at home!! seronokkk..ok la..i guess i'll stop right here..

till next time.assalamualaikum :)